How Do You Fit In All In?

I asked a mid-30s business owner what he wished I would write about. My client, an exhausted young dad, did not hesitate. He sheepishly responded as if he was the only person in the world with this challenge. Sadly, I think he convinced himself he was failing miserably while everyone else had this all figured out.

How do people get it all done? It feels overwhelming to juggle so much: run and grow my business, spend quality time with God, my wife and toddler, exercise, eat healthy, keep up with household chores, social life, extended family, writing.  It feels endless. I am not even sleeping enough. I wonder how to get some downtime to just have some fun, or read an enjoyable book!

As I listened to him, I was instantly transported to a scene 37 years earlier.

I’ve been there.

It’s the crack of dawn, sitting up in my bed, coffee cup in one hand, pen in the other, notepad on lap, and some papers scattered on my bedcovers.  My hair is disheveled, dark circles under my eyes, wearing my favorite Miss Elaine cotton pink nightgown. I am driven, determined and going to figure this out!  

My daughter, Julia, is 3 1/2 years old. Her father is a hotel developer, and travels 2-3 days a week. I am in my 2nd year of building my business coaching practice. It’s going ok but not as well as I wanted. I’m finding it difficult to balance it all.

I did a time management course.  Then I read a few books. It helped but nothing changed. I hadn’t practiced anything I was learning.

As I listened to my client, I related to what he was saying. A young child’s needs are constant, demanding and unpredictable.  A new business takes focus, energy and sacrifice.

I heard something the other day on a podcast: Often the simplest solutions are more impactful than complicated change.

I thought back to what helped me at that stage in life. Yes, I changed ONE THING and everything got better.  

I thought back to other clients who made one change that significantly helped with the how to get it all done dilemma.  A speaker and author hired a housekeeper. A professional  chef found a new job with a 4 day work week.  A memorable couple who built homes trained up their executive staff and moved to a foreign country for part of the year.

There are so many ways to approach this.  What did I do? I chose one thing to put into practice from my research.

One simple thing.

The common denominator in all time management materials emphasized the importance of planning your week thoroughly.  I had struggled to make the 45-minute commitment before the week began. I knew it would make a difference if I could figure out how to find that uninterruptible corner of my life to do this.  I kept failing and felt scattered.

After several starts and stops, I came up with the solution. I decided I would set my alarm for 5 am on Monday mornings.  This was a time when my family was sound asleep and I would be assured some uninterruptible time to think and create my game-plan for the week.

That one thing changed my life.  

To this day, I still plan my week early each Monday morning. It never fails to transport me from feeling overloaded to having a workable game-plan and excitement about my week!  I outline the process in my Life As Art e-book.

What happens if plans change?

Simple: Build in enough margin—don’t over-plan. Life is unpredictable, and changes are inevitable, so it's essential to leave room for flexibility. Review and update your plan every day based on how your week is going. As they say, sh*t happens, and that’s OK—adaptability is part of effective time management.

There’s a saying found on a site called Farnam Street: The map is not the territory.

The map of reality is not reality. Even the best maps are imperfect. That’s because maps are reductions of what they represent. If a map were to represent the territory with perfect fidelity, it would no longer be a reduction and thus would no longer be useful to us. A map can also be a snapshot from a point in time, representing something that no longer exists. This is important to keep in mind as we think through problems and seek to make better decisions.

In other words, your plan (your “map”) is a guide, not a rigid set of instructions. When the territory (your actual week) changes, don’t cling to the map—adjust it. Regularly reviewing and tweaking your schedule ensures it remains aligned with your priorities and reality.

Finally, one powerful tool for staying flexible while maintaining structure is called time blocking. Time blocking helps break down your day into dedicated chunks for specific tasks, allowing you to focus deeply on each activity, described here by James Clear, author of Atomic Habits. This approach helps ensure your plan is not only achievable but also adaptable, leaving room for both planned tasks and the unexpected moments that inevitably pop up.

What’s ONE area you want to improve?

Back to you: Do you wonder how to get it all done? Or is there ONE area of your life you want to do a better job? Or is there ONE part of your life you would like to enhance? OK, write that intention down.

Explore possible simple solutions.  Make your own list. Ask your friends for ideas.  Research your specific situation on line. Pray about it.  Journal your emotions on the issue.

Build a document with your top 10 discoveries. Be OK with giving this process a few weeks to percolate.  Then go to your wisest advisors and get their input.  That may be helpful or just give you perspective—which is always a good thing. In the end, trust yourself to discover the ONE THING that will make all the difference.  Not perfect, just much better.  

Remember, you cannot manage time: The sun rises and sets whether you manage it or not.  You can only manage yourself!

What questions do you have that I can write about next time?

Thanks for reading.

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